Friday, February 25, 2011

Don't be a drag, just be a queen

I've got the vapors - tying up a tutu, putting on a wig, and glitterizing skin creates euphoria for a costume-loving, 40-something SAHM (Stay At Home Mom). Had to do it for my hang with Lady Gaga at the second stop on her Born This Way tour. Three things I said yesterday that I've never said before:
1. "Do you mind if I wear the same wig as you?"- to my friend Deb.
2. "I'll be ready in 10 minutes...I need to put on my tutu." - to the taxi driver.
3. "I hope I don't get pee on my ribbons" - tutu satin and urine not good.
I'm gaga for Gaga - she sings and dances for 2 hours in 10 inch heels AND plays the piano in a bikini and fishnets! Also noteworthy, lady was inspired to perform because she was bullied in school, doesn't lie about drinking whiskey & smoking weed while she writes, fights for equal rights, AND preaches while she performs, "don't leave here loving me more, leave loving yourself more." The 24 year old claims in the 60 Minutes interview that changing her name from Stefani Germanotta to Lady Gaga, inspired by Queen's Radio Gaga, allowed her to leave behind a massive amount of insecurities. Maybe I'll change my artist name to "Sizzle", which is a nickname that came about at a restaurant because the maitre d thought the "Cecil party" was actually the "Sizzle party." If I use the pseudonym, I'll honor Gaga's rules:

Don't lie about what you do when you write - there's a crawlspace involved but more on that in another entry.

Be eccentric...maybe I'll show up at the bus stop in my blue leopard pj's.

Write about provocative subject matter - The shrews in the drop-off line at school are getting a lot of air time on the town list serve.

Perform in something outrageous - At the next comedy open mic, game on! Forget the "TART" tube top. Anyone know how to make a spark-shooting bra and thong?

Until then, I'll keep workin' my skirt to live up to the words, "Don't be a drag, just be a you were born this way!"


  1. you could never be a drag - more on the shrews, please? i think their cousins live in OC.

  2. Ahhh Leees. Thanks.

    Yes, they are everywhere. A man called a few SAHMs "shrews," and the list serve is up in arms. Of course, I have a bit about shrews in my stand up act!


  3. "Sizzle"... Not unlike your friend "Piece a' Cake"!
    Great blog!